For those of you who don’t feel you are organically meeting potential dates, I want to suggest that maybe it’s time for you to try something new ( and fun)!

Make the first move.

Why?

An important part of practicing the Law of Attraction comes from the word attraction….can you see the word “action” in there? One of the fastest and easiest ways to be in “action” is to consciously practice flirting every day. Flirting is a playful way to engage someone in conversation and it can be done in a friendly, not necessarily sexual manner.

If you are having an adverse reaction to the idea of flirting, think of it this way – it’s networking for your romantic life!  Before you try this out on someone you are super attracted to, I suggest spending a week “practicing.”

Make a commitment to compliment 3 strangers a day. These strangers should be of the approximate age and gender that you are seeking. Whether you find them at work, on the bus or subway, in line at the bank or Starbucks, the elevator or the grocery store, strike up a little communication. Here’s how:

• Make eye contact
•  Smile
• Try a simple compliment such as:

” I love the color of your shirt, it really makes your eyes pop.”
“Wow, great watch, I really like the style.”
“Great shoes!”

• Be friendly, open, and don’t have any expectations.

The point is just to open a door and see what happens. They may simply say thank you and ignore you or they may return the compliment or perhaps start a conversation with you.

Does this really work?  I have a friend who was shopping for melons at Whole Foods and asked a guy if he knew the secret to selecting a ripe one.  They’ve been married for years now.

Give a try and let me know what happens!

In the popular movie We Bought A Zoo, I loved when a teenage boy remembers the moment his father taught him that you only have to have courage and be brave for 20 seconds to make something great happen.

This got me thinking about all the people who share with me that they “fear getting hurt again” as if that is a strong enough excuse not to do the work of getting prepared for love.

There is always risk when getting into a relationship.…in order to find your soulmate, you need to deal with accepting that risk.  What if the character in that movie was right?  What if you only had to focus for 20 seconds to rise above a fearful challenge?

My sister Debbie’s new book on the subject of courage and confidence is the ideal addition to your soulmate attraction plan.

Once again she is at her best sharing tools to help you move gracefully and steadily through your fear of love and potential rejection.  No wonder I am so proud to announce the release of:

Courage: Overcoming Fear and Igniting Self-Confidence.

Debbie is an expert on this topic. Three years ago she was told that a rare form of cancerous tumors, that had been surgically removed a decade ago, had come back.

There is no known cure for what she has. But, they told her, there were a variety of treatments to try. Many of which made her even sicker than she already was.  Some days she could barely lift her head off the pillow.  She endured pain as well as the fear that she might die.

At one point she was confined to bed for 18 months. And yet, through it all, she dug deep to find the courage to live.  The courage to try both traditional and experimental treatments.  The courage to travel to major hospitals and cancer centers around the country in search of a cure.

She even sat down with Oprah for an hour-long in-depth interview on the OWN network baring her soul and sharing her story with the world.

Today she is doing so much better and she is out of bed and in control of her life looking forward to a very bright future.

During this difficult time, Debbie finished her new book, Courage and in it she shares her proven process…a process for overcoming fear, insecurity and unlocking the enormous courage that resides within.

Debbie has excelled in the school of life, overcoming drug addiction, divorce, a heartbreaking betrayal, and the grave cancer diagnosis. For decades, she has been helping people break free from the emotional baggage that has held them hostage.

In this new book she outlines a transformational process that will deliver you to a version of yourself and your life that will inspire, excite and exhilarate you. You will discover how to accept and transform your flaws, your misgivings, your weaknesses, and your fears.

You will learn how to be confident, stand in your strength, and feel great about your life.  You will activate the seven guiding principles of courage to become strong, powerful, confident and courageous.

Plus you will experience a new kind of courage and a new kind of confidence that will propel you into an infinitely beautiful and inspiring future. I promise you that when you recognize the strength, power, and freedom of the courage that has been present in you all along, you will realize that you have the power to accomplish your heart’s desires.

Wayne Dyer wrote in the Foreword to Courage:

 ”I can assure you that you will find yourself becoming more and more equipped to deal with all of your life’s challenges from a new and stronger position of self-confidence and, yes, courage as well.”

I agree. Read Courage. Whatever area in your life you need more courage or more self confidence, this book will provide you the breakthrough you are seeking.  There is really no excuse for living without love in your life. Try being brave…20 seconds at a time and be sure to let me know what happens!

CLICK HERE:  http://bit.ly/HFyJr4  to purchase your copy. It comes with a priceless bonus bundle and a chance to win many incredible prizes-including a one-hour coaching session with Debbie herself!

You’ll be particularly inspired by the amazing stories of transformation in this book. This same transformation is available to you as well, you don’t have to wait to be guided through the processs, get your copy of Courage now!  http://bit.ly/HFyJr4

You Hold The Power To Manifest Love

Single men and women, who have read my book The Soulmate Secret, and are actively seeking to manifest the love of their life, often ask me if I can share with them the secret to speeding up the process. They tell me they are tired of waiting, wishing, hoping and yearning for the day the One will arrive.

While I know and believe that we can consciously manifest the love of our life into our lives (I’ve done it as have thousands of my students around the world) we don’t get to choose the speed at which it all comes together.

I believe that “savoring the waiting” is an important part of the process….this is where we get to really enjoy our last days of being single, a time where we can relish the journey and joyfully anticipate our soulmates arrival.

You can choose to allow yourself to feel desperate and alone or you can choose to feel happy and blessed. One way to adopt the “happy and blessed” mindset is to understand the ancient Japanese aesthetic known as wabi sabi which honors all things old, worn, weathered, imperfect, and impermanent. In fact, it seeks to find “beauty and perfection in the imperfections.”

You can now choose to adopt a wabi sabi perspective to your final days as a “single”rather than choosing to succumb to weeks or months of simply “enduring” the wait.

Think of it this way: when the seeds of a flower have been planted in the ground and the first leaves begin to sprout, the gardener does not tug on the leaves every day to make the plant grow fast. He trusts that Mother Nature will play her role and then when the time is right, the flower will blossom. Like a gardener, you have planted a seed and invited love to unfold in your life.

The best part of practicing wabi sabi is that it will become infinitely beneficial once you are with your beloved. I call this the practice of Wabi Sabi Love.

Why would you take the time to learn how to apply Wabi Sabi Love to your relationship? Because 50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second marriages and 74% of third marriages all end in divorce! We aren’t born with the innate knowledge of how to “do” relationship. Even worse, we’ve been brainwashed by modern day society to look for and seek perfection, which leads to an ongoing state of frustration and dissatisfaction.

In truth, we all know that perfection is not possible. But with Wabi Sabi Love we can come to appreciate our own and the other’s imperfection, and can actually experience a more natural state of grace than we thought possible.

By learning and practicing Wabi Sabi Love you begin to accept the flaws, imperfections, and limitations – as well as the gifts and blessings – that form your shared history as a couple. Acceptance and its counterpart, understanding, are crucial to achieving relationship harmony.

It’s is sacred love, the highest form of love, and like most things worth striving for in life requires patience, commitment, personal responsibility, and practice. Imagine how great you will feel when you know your partner loves all of you, all the time? The good, the bad, and everything in between!

My soulmate of fourteen years, Brian, and I credit the success of our relationship to applying Wabi Sabi Love to everyday life.

If you want to have more love, fun, harmony, and passion while on your way to your soul mate relationship, I encourage you to order this book today (http://thewabisabibook.com). There are several terrific free bonuses that come with it including audio workshops from John Gray, Harville Hendrix, Alison Armstrong and more!

We went to a dinner party the other night and re-connected with several old friends we hadn’t seen in a long time.

My friend Patti was sharing with me about her daughter Denise (now 36), and only child, who is “having a hard time finding a man.”

Denise is an attorney in a top New York firm, she had an Ivy League education, is attractive and fit, and is a total perfectionist who is insisting that she marry a man who also has an Ivy League education, earns more money than she does, and her list of physical attributes is quite lengthy….and she is still single, what’s up?

She also wants an “alpha” male who is highly ambitious (just like her). Patti has suggested to her daughter that she learn to cook at least one meal so she can invite a prospective mate over for a romantic dinner but Denise is completely resistant.

Denise does meet men but they want to be her “friend” but not her life partner.
I began to share with Patti that perhaps Denise is so comfortable in her masculine energy (which is where women live when they are in high work mode) that she has forgotten how to access her feminine, receptive energies.

If she wants a masculine male, he will want a woman who can bring him her feminine energy after work hours.

I also shared with her how this was exactly an issue I had to deal with before manifesting Brian. Prior to meeting Brian, I once had a date say to me
“your balls are bigger than mine.”

Ouch!

I knew I had to figure this stuff out.

I did some research and ended up creating rituals for myself to consciously transition from “work mode” to “play mode.” Two of my favorite ways to bring myself back into my feminine energy involved dancing by yourself after work and then taking a long, hot bubble bath and letting my work day drift away.

For strong, successful women, this is a super important topic and worth investigating. To help you do just that, my friend, Cherry Norris, made a very fun and enlightening feature film on this topic and you can buy the DVD for only $9.95 Check it out here: http://cherrynorris.com/datingproducts/

My new book Wabi Sabi Love is now available!  Finding your Soulmate is just the beginning.  Read how successful couples keep the soulmate fire burning.  Receive a priceless bonus bundle of advanced love attraction resources and techniques when you order your copy right here:   Wabi Sabi Love

I recently read Wayne Dyers new book WISHES FULFILLED and fell in love with it.

In this brilliant book he says, “by using your imagination and practicing the art of assuming the feeling of your wishes being fulfilled, and steadfastly refusing to allow any evidence of the outer world to distract you from your intentions, you will discover that you, by virtue of your spiritual awareness, possess the ability to become the person you were destined to be. Wow!

The “feelings” of knowing and trusting that what you have asked for is already yours is the key to manifestation success!

Last week I interviewed Wayne on my radio show to discuss the book and the topic of “negative thoughts” came up…I shared with him that so many of my students get stuck in doubt, fear and negative thinking.

Wayne’s response was:

“We really have to remember that our senses and our thoughts LIE to us all the time.” Just because you are having a thought doesn’t mean its true!”

Wayne strongly believes that we need to learn to re-program our minds, to learn to speak to ourselves in life-affirming “I Am statements.” I am loved, I am content, I am healthy…. and to also develop our capacity to live in gratitude.

In fact, he suggests that one way to do this is in the 5 minutes before you fall asleep each night, allow yourself to marinate in the feelings of these kinds of statements, to deeply feel love, contentment, gratitude so while you sleep thru the night you are re-programming yourself.

When you find yourself having negative thoughts, try this: stop, acknowledge to yourself what you are thinking…internally say cancel-cancel, then create a positive affirmation that FEELS GOOD IN YOUR BODY. Statements such as: I am a kind and loving being or I am grateful for all the love in my life right now.

Use statements that feel most natural to you. Also, take a moment to feel gratitude…close your eyes, dive deep into your heart and take a moment to re-experience gratitude…. You attract MORE of what you are grateful for!

I want to suggest that those of you who truly, deeply desire a soulmate that you begin to let go of your doubts of what is possible for you…..remember that the word “impossible” is really “I’m possible.”

One of my favorite quotes in WISHES FULFILLED is from the great teacher, Neville, who said “Make your future dream a present fact by assuming the feeling of the wish fulfilled.” I strongly encourage you to write this down and look at it daily.

P.S. You can hear my interview with Wayne Dyer here: (he is on in the second half hour)

My new book Wabi Sabi Love is now available!  Finding your Soulmate is just the beginning.  Read how successful couples keep the soulmate fire burning.  Receive a priceless bonus bundle of advanced love attraction resources and techniques when you order your copy right here:   Wabi Sabi Love

The Only REAL Choice in True Manifestation

Do you want to be “right” or do you want to find love?

I recently gave a free online seminar on the Three Keys To Manifesting Love and I later heard from a few people who are “insisting” that love isn’t possible for them because:

**They are in their 60′s and it’s a “fact” there are a lot fewer available, appropriate men.

**Their “one and only soulmate” has now reincarnated as their grandchild.

**According to channeled entities they “karmically” are not entitled to a soulmate this lifetime.

These are just a few of the many reasons, beliefs, and excuses I have heard as to why people have convinced themselves that they can’t and won’t find love.

Here’s what I have to say about this: Baloney!  Not true!

But… because they are holding onto these beliefs so tightly, chances are they will be right.

They won’t find love.

They are using the Law of Attraction against themselves.

Here’s how to not fall into this trap.

We each have many opportunities for a soulmate in this lifetime.  I personally know of a woman who is on her third soulmate.  She is now in her seventies and outlived the first two men. She has recently remarried.  This isn’t a matter of simply finding three husbands, she has manifested three true soulmates.

Whoever made up the story that we each only get one big love in a lifetime is wrong.  It’s just not true.

And, yes, while there are statistically less available men over sixty, remember that you only need one and if you are giving your time, energy, intention and attention to manifesting love you will prevail over the statistics….unless you decide to believe you can’t!!!!

Imagine that you are sixty or seventy or older and you must find a job….you could sit home and say it’s impossible, I’m just too old or you could choose to “know and believe” and then you will get busy and creative and manifest that new job.

The Law of Attraction is a law, just like gravity is a law….it’s working all the time whether you choose to be aware of it or not.  We are always drawing to us the people, places and experiences that match our state of being.

I want to suggest that those of you who truly, deeply desire a soulmate that you begin to let go of your doubts of what is possible for you…..remember that the word “impossible” is really “I’m possible.”

If you are ready to let go of the beliefs that are blocking you from love and open to the reality that you are more than capable of manifesting the love of your life, then please join me for my 5 week Soulmate Secret online course……

>>> Its starts on April 4, 2012 and you can register here.

So back to the question I originally asked you….

Do you want to be “right” or do you want to find love?

Suzy

There are many ways to write out your soulmate wish list.

to my soulmate…..

i wait for you, the man who will share the rest of my life….as i will share the rest of yours….
my soulmate…my partner in spirit…..my love…..

you will make me smile…..i will look up to you, literally and figuratively…..you are respected by your peers and loved by your family….

we will fill our lives with memories of faraway places and the spirit of the universe….

we will learn from each other…..we will honor our bodies so that we may live long and fruitful lives, never taking any our days for granted….

we will walk hand in hand along the shore….the salt bracing our bodies, the air breathing life into our new union…..

i will create with abundance…words, images…ideas….i will thrive under your gaze…..you will pause….and know newness and gentleness and softness because of me…..

our children will see us in a new light….their mother or father forging a path along an unused road…..they will smile and their love will take on new meaning as they learn our lessons…..

we will delight in our grandchildren…..sharing and laughing and teaching with an ease and luxury of time we didn’t have as parents….

we will grow our food and nourish our bodies with movement and laughter and love……

we will cherish animals once neglected, giving them the love they always sought but never expected or knew…..

we will be filled with wonder and awe and respect and delight in all that is around us…..small things made bigger…..big things made smaller…..we will shrink or grow our ideas to fit each other and our needs of the moment….

we are spirits….we are spiritual….our touch will heal each other…..our sighs will land on gentle ears…..our shouts will raise roofs…..the world will vibrate with our energies…

we will know that life is to be lived, is meant to be shared, is meant to be seized……
i wait for you, the man who will share the rest of my life….as i will share the rest of yours….

i am ready….

i am willing…..

i am loving you already as you are already loving me….

i am here…..you will find me….

you have found me….i am in your heart….you are in my heart……

we have already shared eternity…..

we are eternal

Can’t you just feel the level of her commitment, readiness, and open heartedness?  Suzy, thank you for sharing this with us!

If it appears that your soulmate will be a tad late for this year’s Valentine’s Day, I

St. Anthony of Padua

would suggest  you create a fun and out-of-the-box way to enjoy it. Here are a few ideas:

1) I once went to great singles party where each invitee had to bring their favorite (still single and still on good terms) ex-lover. We then shared with the group what we loved most about them and attempted to fix each other up. It was a lot of fun.

2) Create a pot-luck dinner in your home for some of your single friends and share all the things you are grateful in your life right now. The take turns appreciating each other.

3) In Morelia, Mexico, at the San Miguelito restaurant, they feature a room with more than 700 images and statues of St. Anthony of Padua, all upside down. For decades single women have come to this room to pray to St. Anthony to intercede for them and send them their destined soulmate.

There is a notebook below the statue where you write out your specific soulmate wish list. There are bags with coins and the women are told to take 13 coins and line them up at the base of the main statue and then walk around the statue 13 times repeating this prayer:

Oh Wonderful St. Anthony, glorious on account of the fame of thy miracles, and through the condescension of Jesus in coming in the form of a little child to rest in thy arms, obtain for me of his bounty the grace which I ardently desire from the depths of my heart. Thou who was so loving towards miserable sinners, regard not the unworthiness of those who pray to thee, but the glory of God that it may be once again magnified by this request which I now make to you. Amen

If you aren’t planning to be in Morelia anytime soon, here’s another possible way to ask St. Anthony of Padua for his assistance: Buy a small statue of Saint Anthony. Remove Baby Jesus from his arms and tell the saint you won’t return the baby unless you manifest your soulmate. You can reinforce your position, by keeping Anthony upside down, so he will understand you are very serious.

1. Write the names of possible candidates on separate pieces of paper.

2. Leave one piece blank.

3. Fold all of them and put them in a dish full of water before you go to bed.

4. Leave the dish outside (if you can).

5. The paper that will be fully open in the morning will show the name of your future husband. In case the blank paper is open then still don’t know your future husband.

However you decide to celebrate Valentine’s Day (or not), know that the lid to your pot in out there….looking for you!

According to a recent “Atlantic Monthly” article, not only are there more singles than ever in history, but

Carol Allen

(according to this article) dating and mating have never been tougher especially for women.

I asked my friend and relationship expert, Carol Allen, for her thoughts on this topic and to share with you a remarkable new series she has created on “what men want.” Here’s what she has to say and a preview to what she has discovered on this topic:

In terms of romantic opportunities, it’s more of a “man’s world” than ever, but don’t panic!

You see, women are doing extremely well – more are graduating from college, medical school, and law school thanmen these days. And male-dominated fields, like construction, manufacturing, and finance, have been hit hardest by the economic woes, so women are now often making more money than the men they’re meeting, too.

But we still typically want a man who is “taller, richer, smarter.” So there are more great women all vying for the same (shrinking) pool of quality men.

Also, while the trend of internet dating has given both men and women unprecedented access to each other (no longer do you have to rely on introductions from friends, or chance encounters at the gym or grocery store with that hot stranger), it’s created a false sense of abundance, causing many singles to have ridiculous standards.

Matchmakers tell me they see this played out again and again everyone is so sure they can “have it all” in a mate, they quickly disqualify anyone for the smallest thing: one misstep (food in your teeth, off-color remark, seeming case of nerves) and that great guy or gal you met is G-O-N-E.

So you’d better know what you’re doing, to be sure you don’t scare off that special someone.

You see, soulmates don’t always recognize each other right away. While couples like Arielle and Brian knew instantly, that’s not always the case. I was just sure I wasn’t going to marry my husband of 14 years, until it hit me that he was the one seven years after I’d met him!

It can take time and shared experiences, to really GET how special someone is and how strongly you connect.

So be sure you know how to handle every step of the way, from the first meeting, to the first date, to the first time you get “up close and personal,” to negotiating how to join your lives.

Since women turn to me for answers, I decided to go straight to the source MEN. I’ve asked the 8 greatest male relationship experts in the world to reveal how to be the woman who stands out in a man’s mind, and just what to do and say at critical moments to tell him you’re the best woman he could possibly find.

It’s called “What Men Want” and it rocks because these men are geniuses who’ve worked with thousands of men for years, and don’t just share their opinions they share what they’ve learned from men of all walks of life, from all over the world.

You see, when you know how to give a man what he wants, you’ll get what you want.

And a soulmate relationship ensues.

Here is just a small sampling of the golden nuggets that come from these incredible men who are willing to reveal their innermost beliefs:

• The men said they were THRILLED when a woman made the first move, and that many men DO NOT love the chase as they’ve been hurt or rejected a lot!

• If you make men feel great about themselves, and that you truly care about them, they’ll WANT to commit. Being needy or clingy, bossy or pushy are the top reasons men withdraw.

• Thousands of men surveyed said what they want MOST from us in bed is an emotional connection!

• All of the experts insist that men want to fall in love as much as women do.

• Despite what you’ve heard, the men swear we SHOULDN’T be dating multiple guys if we really like one as many men find this a turn off, and become intimidated even if they’re strong and confident.

I encourage you to check out Carol’s program. Find out more about “What Men Want” right here.

Lately, the question I am hearing most often is, “How do I overcome my doubt that I will ever find my soulmate?”

First I would ask you to determine: is this a random thought, a random doubt or do you have a serious “belief” that you will never find your soulmate?

It’s important to make this distinction. As human beings, it’s normal to have occasional doubts but, if your core belief is you won’t find your soulmate, this is something that you need to overcome.

When I have a doubt about something, I choose not to buy into. I say to myself “cancel-cancel” and then select a more empowering thought.

For instance, you have the doubt, “I’ll never find my soulmate.”

Change that to “My soulmate is not only out there but he/she is actively seeking me as well and soon we will be together.”

When I have a “belief” about something, I look to see what feeling is attached…is it Fear? Anxiety? It is possibly an intuitive warning to look more closely at something?

Then I will imagine a “worst case scenario” which usually helps me see the issue with perspective, immediately reducing any fear or self-doubt.

Next I begin to investigate the belief. Is it true? Where did it come from? Am I willing to change my belief? If not, what is my payoff for holding onto this belief?

Our beliefs shape our lives and become self-fulfilling prophecies. If we believe we “can’t,” then we get to be right – we can’t.

This can send you in a repeating mental trap if you are not careful. Catching yourself when you are mumbling self defeating doubtful thoughts is the goal. The “Cancel Cancel” mantra seems simplistic but it does work. Interrupt your habitual thought pattern and your life will surely change.

PS My new You Tube Channel is now live. Check out the new Wabi Sabi Love Video Channel : youtube.com/lovewabisabi and thanks for sharing it with your friends and family!