If it appears that your soulmate will be a tad late for this year’s Valentine’s Day, I

St. Anthony of Padua

would suggest  you create a fun and out-of-the-box way to enjoy it. Here are a few ideas:

1) I once went to great singles party where each invitee had to bring their favorite (still single and still on good terms) ex-lover. We then shared with the group what we loved most about them and attempted to fix each other up. It was a lot of fun.

2) Create a pot-luck dinner in your home for some of your single friends and share all the things you are grateful in your life right now. The take turns appreciating each other.

3) In Morelia, Mexico, at the San Miguelito restaurant, they feature a room with more than 700 images and statues of St. Anthony of Padua, all upside down. For decades single women have come to this room to pray to St. Anthony to intercede for them and send them their destined soulmate.

There is a notebook below the statue where you write out your specific soulmate wish list. There are bags with coins and the women are told to take 13 coins and line them up at the base of the main statue and then walk around the statue 13 times repeating this prayer:

Oh Wonderful St. Anthony, glorious on account of the fame of thy miracles, and through the condescension of Jesus in coming in the form of a little child to rest in thy arms, obtain for me of his bounty the grace which I ardently desire from the depths of my heart. Thou who was so loving towards miserable sinners, regard not the unworthiness of those who pray to thee, but the glory of God that it may be once again magnified by this request which I now make to you. Amen

If you aren’t planning to be in Morelia anytime soon, here’s another possible way to ask St. Anthony of Padua for his assistance: Buy a small statue of Saint Anthony. Remove Baby Jesus from his arms and tell the saint you won’t return the baby unless you manifest your soulmate. You can reinforce your position, by keeping Anthony upside down, so he will understand you are very serious.

1. Write the names of possible candidates on separate pieces of paper.

2. Leave one piece blank.

3. Fold all of them and put them in a dish full of water before you go to bed.

4. Leave the dish outside (if you can).

5. The paper that will be fully open in the morning will show the name of your future husband. In case the blank paper is open then still don’t know your future husband.

However you decide to celebrate Valentine’s Day (or not), know that the lid to your pot in out there….looking for you!

My new book Wabi Sabi Love is now available, for more information and how to order, click right here:  Wabi Sabi Love

According to a recent “Atlantic Monthly” article, not only are there more singles than ever in history, but

Carol Allen

(according to this article) dating and mating have never been tougher especially for women.

I asked my friend and relationship expert, Carol Allen, for her thoughts on this topic and to share with you a remarkable new series she has created on “what men want.” Here’s whatshe has to say and a preview to what she has discovered on this topic:

In terms of romantic opportunities, it’s more of a “man’s world” than ever.

You see, women are doing extremely well – more are graduating from college, medical school, and law school thanmen these days. And male-dominated fields, like construction, manufacturing, and finance, have been hit hardest by the economic woes, so women are now often making more money than the men they’re meeting, too.

But we still typically want a man who is “taller, richer, smarter.” So there are more great women all vying for the same (shrinking) pool of quality men.

Also, while the trend of internet dating has given both men and women unprecedented access to each other (no longer do you have to rely on introductions from friends, or chance encounters at the gym or grocery store with that hot stranger), it’s created a false sense of abundance, causing many singles to have ridiculous standards.

Matchmakers tell me they see this played out again and again everyone is so sure they can “have it all” in a mate, they quickly disqualify anyone for the smallest thing: one misstep (food in your teeth, off-color remark, seeming case of nerves) and that great guy or gal you met is G-O-N-E.

So you’d better know what you’re doing, to be sure you don’t scare off that special someone.

You see, soulmates don’t always recognize each other right away. While couples like Arielle and Brian knew instantly, that’s not always the case. I was just sure I wasn’t going to marry my husband of 14 years, until it hit me that he was the one seven years after I’d met him!

It can take time and shared experiences, to really GET how special someone is and how strongly you connect.

So be sure you know how to handle every step of the way, from the first meeting, to the first date, to the first time you get “up close and personal,” to negotiating how to join your lives.

Since women turn to me for answers, I decided to go straight to the source MEN. I’ve asked the 8 greatest male relationship experts in the world to reveal how to be the woman who stands out in a man’s mind, and just what to do and say at critical moments to tell him you’re the best woman he could possibly find.

It’s called “What Men Want” and it rocks because these men are geniuses who’ve worked with thousands of men for years, and don’t just share their opinions they share what they’ve learned from men of all walks of life, from all over the world.

You see, when you know how to give a man what he wants, you’ll get what you want.

And a soulmate relationship ensues.

Here is just a small sampling of the golden nuggets that come from these incredible men who are willing to reveal their innermost beliefs:

• The men said they were THRILLED when a woman made the first move, and that many men DO NOT love the chase as they’ve been hurt or rejected a lot!

• If you make men feel great about themselves, and that you truly care about them, they’ll WANT to commit. Being needy or clingy, bossy or pushy are the top reasons men withdraw.

• Thousands of men surveyed said what they want MOST from us in bed is an emotional connection!

• All of the experts insist that men want to fall in love as much as women do.

• Despite what you’ve heard, the men swear we SHOULDN’T be dating multiple guys if we really like one as many men find this a turn off, and become intimidated even if they’re strong and confident.

I encourage you to check out Carol’s program. Find out more about “What Men Want” right here.

Lately, the question I am hearing most often is, “How do I overcome my doubt that I will ever find my soulmate?”

First I would ask you to determine: is this a random thought, a random doubt or do you have a serious “belief” that you will never find your soulmate?

It’s important to make this distinction. As human beings, it’s normal to have occasional doubts but, if your core belief is you won’t find your soulmate, this is something that you need to overcome.

When I have a doubt about something, I choose not to buy into. I say to myself “cancel-cancel” and then select a more empowering thought.

For instance, you have the doubt, “I’ll never find my soulmate.”

Change that to “My soulmate is not only out there but he/she is actively seeking me as well and soon we will be together.”

When I have a “belief” about something, I look to see what feeling is attached…is it Fear? Anxiety? It is possibly an intuitive warning to look more closely at something?

Then I will imagine a “worst case scenario” which usually helps me see the issue with perspective, immediately reducing any fear or self-doubt.

Next I begin to investigate the belief. Is it true? Where did it come from? Am I willing to change my belief? If not, what is my payoff for holding onto this belief?

Our beliefs shape our lives and become self-fulfilling prophecies. If we believe we “can’t,” then we get to be right – we can’t.

This can send you in a repeating mental trap if you are not careful. Catching yourself when you are mumbling self defeating doubtful thoughts is the goal. The “Cancel Cancel” mantra seems simplistic but it does work. Interrupt your habitual thought pattern and your life will surely change.

PS My new You Tube Channel is now live. Check out the new Wabi Sabi Love Video Channel : youtube.com/lovewabisabi and thanks for sharing it with your friends and family!

Today I want to share a very special story with you…it’s an excerpt for Marci Shimoff’s brilliant New York Times bestselling book LOVE FOR NO REASON—that’s newly out in paperback:

The woman sitting across from me was radiant. Mirabai Devi, an international spiritual teacher from South Africa, was known for the unconditional love that emanated from her, and I could see why. Her dark eyes sparkled, her smile was both serene and joyful, and I felt a warm glow in my heart as I gazed at her.

I pressed the Record button on my digital recorder, and Mirabai began to tell me about her first experience of unconditional love. It had taken place almost 20 years earlier, when, as a young woman, Mirabai experienced an awakening while traveling through Europe:

“It was as if a dam burst in my heart, and the waters overflowed. The love that came forth was unlike anything I’d ever experienced before. Like a flood, it was all-consuming and all-encompassing; I could hardly contain it. I felt electrified; my body was tingling all over. I was so in love with the whole creation that I wanted to hug everyone I met. I knew that couldn’t do that because people would think I was crazy. Still, people could feel it. Everywhere I went they would just come up to me and say, “What can I do for you?” “Can I help you?” “Can I give you a ride?” “Can I get you some food?” “Can I . . . ?” They just wanted to be around me.

Traveling through Holland one afternoon, I stopped on the side of the road and looked at a field of cabbages. All the cabbages were just filled with this iridescent, luminous light. My heart was bursting with love for the cabbages.

I felt union with the whole of creation.

I saw that everything is connected and everything is one. And everything is radiant with this exquisite, ecstatic love.”

I sat transfixed, taking in the details of Mirabai’s remarkable story, and asking myself: Is it possible for me and for others to experience that state of unconditional love all the time?

That was the question I set out to answer in my latest book, Love for No Reason: 7 Steps to Creating a Life of Unconditional Love. As part of my research, I found and interviewed over 150 unconditionally loving people I call “Love Luminaries,” including scientists, psychologists, spiritual teachers, and people whose lives were rich in the qualities of the heart—to find out how to be unconditionally loving.

What I discovered through my research is that each of us can grow in unconditional love, the kind of love that doesn’t depend on any person or situation, what I call Love for No Reason. I found 14 keys that will help you experience this higher state of love more and more of the time. Here are three tips to get you started:

1. Anchor Yourself in Safety. Feeling stressed, unsupported, or fearful essentially takes love off-line. It’s impossible to activate the physiology of unconditional love when you’re experiencing stress and your body is in fight or flight. To quickly switch out of stress mode, take a few deep breaths and consciously relax your pelvic floor, located at the base of your body. This kick-starts your parasympathetic system and sets the stage for what mind/body health expert Dr. Eva Selhub calls your body’s “love response.”

2. Feel Your Feelings. Stifling your emotions or expressing them excessively is equally damaging to your capacity to experience unconditional love. Luckily, there’s a third option: feeling your feelings. This is not the same as “expressing, exaggerating or acting out,” as Love Luminary Raphael Cushnir told me. “All it requires is a gentle focus, a turning toward what’s actually present.”

Practice experiencing your feelings directly and completely by observing them as they move through your mind and body—and then letting them go.

3. Practice Self-Compassion. Try a simple self-love technique that brings you into your heart and reminds you to treat yourself with care. Throughout the day, ask yourself, What’s the most loving thing I can do for myself right now? or What’s the most loving way I can be with myself right now? And then pay attention to the answer and actually do whatever it is. When you love and take care of yourself, you’ll find it inevitably serves everyone.

Practice these simple exercises frequently and you’ll notice more love in your heart. Learning to experience pure love within yourself is the key to living a life of unconditional love. When you fill your own love tank, you bring that love to everything in your life.

Then, as Mirabai experienced, you still love people and things outside yourself, but the difference is that your love doesn’t depend on any of those things, whether people, jobs, relationships, cars, clothes….or even cabbages.

(By Marci Shimoff. Adapted from the NY Times bestselling book Love for No Reason: 7 Steps to Creating a Life of Unconditional Love. This book offers a breakthrough approach to experiencing a lasting state of unconditional love—the kind of love that doesn’t depend on another person, situation, or romantic partner, and that you can access at any time and in any circumstance. This is the key to lasting joy and fulfillment in life.)

I strongly encourage you to order Love for No Reason –NOW out in paperback and receive the wonderful Bonus Package free at www.TheLoveBook.com

After Brian and I got married I discovered that “manifesting a soulmate” was the easy part.

The hard part was just beginning.

I was totally clueless about creating a great relationship. After 44 years of being single, I was used to having my own way (all of the time) and since I managed skip over having a “starter marriage” I had zero experience in “partnership.”

One day I found myself being particularly pushy.  I witnessed myself pointing my right index finger in Brian’s face (left hand on left hip) ragging him out about something…..and I was shocked!  OMG….what was I doing?

I quickly apologized and then in a flash of insight said to him, “the next time I get like this, and unfortunately there will be a next time, you have my permission to ask me “when did Sheila enter the room?” (Sheila is my brilliant, amazing, and some times overbearing Mom)

Brian instantly got it and said to me, “And the next time I am getting too patronizing, you can call me Wayne.” (his much beloved Dad.) This was the amazing beginning of our dedication to practicing Wabi Sabi Love in our relationship…a way to offset problems and allow in more love.

Now you may be thinking….what the heck is Wabi Sabi?

Wabi Sabi is an ancient Japanese art form that honors all things old, worn, weathered, imperfect, and impermanent.  In fact, it seeks to find “beauty and perfection in the imperfections.”  For instance, if you had a large vase with a big crack down the middle of it, a Japanese art museum would put the vase on a pedestal and shine a spotlight on the crack!

My new book, Wabi Sabi Love shows you exactly how to see your partner in a whole new light, so you begin to appreciate, even celebrate  your partner’s imperfections. It transforms “tired” relationships so they feel new, fresh, and exciting-like you’re on your honeymoon again! AND….even if you are not yet with your soulmate, this is a skill worth learning now.

The best way to discover Wabi Sabi Love is through stories and fun, simple exercises, and that’s exactly what you’ll find in the book. Wabi SabiLove reveals secrets that create a passionate, joyful, and loving relationship.

If you are ready for more love, fun, harmony, and passion in your relationship, I encourage you to order my book today. It comes with several terrific free bonuses including audio workshops from John Gray, Harville Hendrix, Alison Armstrong, guided practices, a higher love visioning video and more!

To More Love and Light in Your Relationship,

Arielle

P.S: You’ll be particularly inspired by the story on page 211, which shows how Michelle Obama accomplished a Wabi Sabi Love transformation faster than she ever thought possible. You can do it too, but you have to buy the book to get this kind of transformation in your relationship, so hurry before the first printing sells out.

Get your copy of Wabi Sabi Love now!

Single for the holidays?

Feeling down about it?

Trying to talk yourself out of your feelings?

We live in a world that is forever preaching to us to be upbeat, optimistic and have positive thoughts.

I disagree.

Some times we have to allow ourselves to simply feel what we are feeling. To deny, ignore, or suppress our true feelings doesn’t make these feelings go away and can actually make us sick on some level.

Here’s what I do when I am experiencing negative emotions.

First, identify the feeling. Is it sadness? anger? resentment? disappointment? Then I give myself full permission, for 3 minutes, to completely dive into my thoughts and feelings and I do my best to stay totally focused on the emotion. (no happy thoughts allowed!)

Next, I take out my journal and write down in detail my experience, including a description of my expectations that aren’t currently being met. I then check to see if there are any other feelings bubbling up that are asking to be felt, and if so, I repeat the process.

Finally, I make a gratitude list of all the things, large and small, that I am grateful for. My list often begins with items such as:

“I am grateful for the fresh air I have to breath and clean water to drink.”

During this exercise, truly allow yourself to feel the depth of your gratitude.

Next week I will share with you a proven process to create a magical 2012 to magnetize new love into your life.

If you are ready for more love, fun, harmony and passion in your relationship, I recommend my new book, Wabi Sabi Love in this special pre-publication launch – there are several terrific free bonuses that come with it!  Click here to check it out:  WabiSabiLove

I’m writing about a very tender topic today…

Have you ever found yourself at the end of a relationship asking yourself, “How can I survive this?”

It can feel like you’re walking around with an open wound, right? Everything aches.
In fact it hurts just to be awake and sometimes there’s no end in sight.

And then you realize: it’s not just your relationship that broke… your heart broke too. You broke.

I’m sorry to bring this up. We’ve all been there and no one likes to talk about this side of love… but I want to help.  Because if you’re experiencing debilitating heartache right now, or you’re still dealing with the residue of past heartache…The pain you’re feeling doesn’t have to continue.

The good news here is that most breakup pain isn’t caused by ending your relationship. It’s created by the way you’ve been taught to end your relationships.

Unfortunately, most of us have been misled to “break apart” in devastating and destructive ways… and we make damaging and dangerous mistakes that end up creating more suffering, costing us our sanity and stealing our joy. They can even prevent future love!

That’s why so many of us spend 5… 10… 30 years trying to heal from past breakups.

And the crazy thing is, we think that we have to just suffer through it and just hope that eventually, someday, we’ll get over it and won’t hurt anymore. We’re left feeling powerless and hopeless to help ourselves in any really meaningful way.

Yet, now it’s time to learn a different way …

Discover the Art of Conscious Completion in This FREE Online Seminar

Rather than only focus on the pain and problem, this empowering online teleseminar will teach you the step by step process of how you can accelerate your healing by using the pain you are in to catalyze a whole new life.

Until we learn how to heal from these breakup mistakes and learn how to conscious complete our relationships in an entirely new way, we run the risk of remaining in pain and living lesser lives … making things worse for ourselves and our children or loved ones.

You are not alone. We all know what it’s like to hurt and suffer from a breakup. And I want to help you get out of any pain like that quickly!

And that’s why I’m writing this email today… to share with you an empowering training from licensed psychotherapist and national bestselling author of Calling in “The One,” Katherine Woodward Thomas.

This FREE Online Seminar will deliver you an entirely new way to approach the end of love.

Katherine will equip you with a powerful, proven step by step process to help you avoid the hellacious damage so often associated with breaking up… as well as show you how to heal any damage you may have suffered in the past.

Learn How to Avoid (or heal from!) the 3 Breakup Mistakes that Cause Suffering, Steal Joy & Prevent Future Love:

Katherine has helped over 100,000 people find love and now she’s helping us heal and complete relationships in a loving way.  With such a difficult subject matter, I’m touched by her wisdom, kindness and comforting manner in carrying people through her process.

So if you’re hurting, or still not over that past relationship, I really hope you’ll get the salve you need when you listen to this call.

Even if you’re not in a breakup right now, this information is vital to any of us who has ever suffered the painful ending of a relationship. Plus it doesn’t cost a thing to attend.

Sign Up Now For This LIVE Global Teleconference Event

Make sure you sign up even if you can’t attend live-she’ll send you the recording.

Does social media help you or hurt you when it comes to your soulmate search?

Do you know what “social media” is?   Are you tempted to jump in to the internet but don’t know where to start?  You are not alone.

The dating and mating rules have all changed since Facebook, Twitter and now Google+ are more mainstream than ever. By mainstream I mean that more and more women are flocking to the internet, many actively using the tools there available for free, to meet and screen potential partners.

If you are you a bit of a dinosaur when it comes to social media, you are definitely missing an opportunity your single sisters are cashing in on.

Take a look at these stats experts at Lab42 found when they went out to take the pulse of today’s relationship hunters as well as established lovers. There survey asking 500 social media users over age 18 some rather personal questions about meeting people, cheating, communication and more revealed the telling numbers.

Of respondents not in a relationship, 26% contact someone they are interested in on Facebook.  42% still prefer in person meetings, however many women feel safer checking out the prospect from a distance.

After meeting someone one interesting, 57% friend them on Facebook, 29% research them on social networks (Twitter, Linked In, Google+) and 26% google them. Amazing what you can find out this way.

While a full 77% rejected online dating as lame, “It just seems wrong.  People always lie about who they are on line.”  A happy 64% report writing and receiving loving messages on their facebook pages. If you follow Brian and I on Facebook, you know how true this is.  We love using social media to chat with each other.

“How do you meet people you’d like to get to know better? How do you treat each other once you’re together?” asks Charlie White, mashable.com, ”Social media turns out to be a great accelerator for exposing you to potential mates, but does that change the basic way people interact with each other?”

You bet!  Don’t miss out on the fun.  Check out the entire survey for yourself right here:   http://mashable.com/2011/11/06/social-media-users-in-love/

Remember, we were all dinosaurs at one time.  Start by friending me on Facebook, you will see a link at the bottom of this page.  Then research your friends and family.  Read through their pages and see if you don’t smile ear to ear.  Social media is exactly that…social….and tons of fun.

Who knows, your future soulmate may be looking at your Facebook profile right now….

For a free chapter of my new book Wabi Sabi Love, follow this link:  http://WabiSabiLove.com

I once heard someone say, “If you teach your children the Golden Rule, you will have left them an incalculable estate.”

Truer words were never spoken. More than anything, the Golden Rule is about kindness. They improve your relationship with yourself and with others. It’s not much in fashion these days to talk about the benefits of kindness, honesty and decency, but the benefits are there and they are valuable and worth the trouble.

Copyright © 2005 – 2011 Simple Truths, LLC
Watch Power of Kindness

If you like this video clip, I encourage you to Share it with the world and join me on my mission to empower and inspire millions of people around the globe.

At the end of this video you’ll see simple instructions on how you can help.

Together we can spread words of Encouragement, Inspiration & Empowerment one video at a time… and wouldn’t you agree our world could use a little more “Positivity” these days!

Together we can make a difference…

I believe in paying attention to “signs” and this week I’ve been hearing about wedding vows everywhere I go.

We just returned from Dallas where we attended the wedding of our niece Sarah and her beloved, Mark.  It was a beautiful garden affair, at sunset, with a brass quartet and a very enthusiastic, loving and gracious minister.

The bride was stunning, the groom beaming, and one of the highlights of the ceremony for me was a recital of Sarah’s all-time favorite Dr. Seuss poem that expressed the depth and the whimsy of the happy couple:

I will love you in the park, and I will love you in the dark.
I will love you through good or bad,
When you’re happy and when your sad.
I will love you when you’re rich or when you’re poor and in a ditch
And I will have and I will hold,
Ten years from now a thousand fold.
And now we’re here at this new start,
So I’ll start by loving you with my whole heart.

For those of you in serious love manifestation process, it’s always a good idea to begin creating some ideas of what your wedding day will include. What music do you want to dance to? What will the cake taste like?  Is it a daytime or nighttime affair?

And, while I’m not certain you should be buying the dress or tux this early, I do believe it’s helpful to the manifestation process to “feel” what you will be feeling like on your wedding day with all the attendant tastes, sights, sounds, textures, etc.

Are you willing to make this a part of your “living as if” component?